Writings – You’ll be Confounded, not Awakened

An edited talk, by David Spero

It’s the level of your spiritual evolution that creates your destiny. It’s the degree and quality of your subjective vibration, or spiritual mood, that creates your entire reality, both on the inside and outside. The more that you are able to locate this mood in its purity, within your own Heart, and surrender into it, the more you can become saturated in its Fullness and Depth. 

There are many different levels of spiritual perception, many different levels of spiritual awakening, until effortless, natural samadhi is enjoyed. This everlasting awakening is called sahaja samadhi, which means effortless, natural, continuous, relaxation in the Divine. It is a person whose humanness has relaxed into Pure Consciousness, forever. It is the Divine, holding you in its Love-Grip.

If your spiritual evolution has ripened sufficiently, all you need to do is meet someone in this relaxed condition to allow your Heart to come open. As a result of this meeting, there will be enough influx of this tremendous Intensity to eradicate any obstacles that may be acting to prevent the ongoing sense of Liberated Consciousness. 

If you’re ready, just a few minutes and you may come on fire. If you don’t come on fire, don’t feel guilty. Don’t say, “What have I done wrong?” You’ve done nothing wrong. You’ve never done anything wrong. You’ve made no mistakes if you’ve walked into a room full of the presence of the Living Divine. The Divine is fully graced in this Presence here, in this room. It’s fully active. It’s full of heat. It’s full of Light and it’s full of coolness. It has all the contradictory opposites active within its massively awakened Heart-Intensity. It is Divine Love to the Heart and Pristine Emptiness to the mind.

There is nothing that can take you into this Awakened Heart Consciousness, except for love. If you love an object, an object will end up defining you in some way, binding you in a limitation. If you love an authority, spiritual or worldly, it will eventually become heavy-handed with you and try to control you; use you for its own relative purposes. If it is an institution that you love, you will be told how to behave and what to do, so that its image can survive in you and ultimately, you’ll be hurt and betrayed. It’s upsetting for me to even contemplate these distorted possibilities in spiritual practice. 

This meditation is about an Ecstatic Condition surviving in its own intensity and somehow, miraculously, you’re allowed to be the recipient of It. Consciousness makes a home in you, so the word recipient is not really correct. It actually comes to abide in you and you in It, and then It in everything. This Consciousness is awakened in innocence, vulnerability and love.

The Awakened Heart is supremely brimming with blissful happiness. That doesn’t mean you can’t become angry. It doesn’t mean that you can’t feel sadness. It doesn’t mean that you never feel lonely again.

This awareness has a profoundly empty quality about it. Therefore, you may feel profoundly alone for a certain time. You may feel Divine Loneliness even here when we are sitting together in meditation. This loneliness helps you realize that you’re not part of the human race, that you’ve transcended it all. You may feel invisible even in public places; no one sees you because you are so deeply, profoundly cloaked in this isolated aspect of Pure Consciousness.

When you begin to enjoy this freedom from the inner and outer you begin to taste nectar, amrita. When you start to taste this ambrosia, you’ll go out of your mind forever. Some bees are known to drown in the honey of the hive. They fall in it and drown, as they are eating. That is how it will be for you, as this Great Bliss begins to occupy your being. You will merge into it. You will cease being, in a sense; as That adopts your life. Where you once lived, That will go on being. 

This benediction will occur either through your Inner Self or in relationship to an Awakened Master, a human being who is fully unperturbed by non-awakening and its consequences. I love to say to people that this condition is beyond Awakening and non-awakening. I experience a blissful joy when I repeat this to an audience. I really want you to hear what is being said. This condition includes ignorance, doesn’t conquer it. In the end, you simply intuit that your own Heart is the last subtle residue of Pure Consciousness, which is amrita, Divine Love.

So, the key, after a certain point of spiritual practices, is just to be yourself, loving without inhibition. That means going beyond the fear that the whole human race might turn its back on you. It’s a singular sensation to become love, not a dualistic one. 

Life is not a business deal; it is Ecstatic Love. Therefore, life is for the fool. Life is for the weak. Life is for the surrendered; not for the strong and powerful. It’s not for the domineering authorities. It’s for the ones who keep on asking for love. It’s fiery and invincible and you’ll feel it moving through these walls here, while we sit together, in this precious time, this very precious time and not just within these walls. 

You’ll begin to feel it active in you, endlessly active in your sleep, in your waking, in your dreams, in your visions. You’ll feel it in the food that you eat. You’ll feel it when you make love. You’ll feel it all the time. It’s then that you’ll realize that all the different scriptures, all the different religions are just maps. You don’t want to live in a map, do you? You want to walk up the real hill. You want to see the real sunset, don’t you? You want to go into the ocean, not some picture of an ocean. You don’t want to sit reading spiritual books your whole life, do you?

So, you get Ecstatic and you get Full. The Divine begins to find its way back into the world and then you’re put into a kind of crazy state. You’ve spent your whole life trying to find it “within.” You find it, you think you’ve arrived, and then the Divine will take that experience away. Why? So that the Divine can finally confound you into its own mystery. You’ll be confounded, not awakened. You’ll be loved to the extreme. 

Last night I was watching a program about wolves and how they kill as a pack. Eating the victim was their love for that victim. These animals relinquish their lives for each other, to feed each other. You know the way it goes. There’s something that wants to masticate you, something that wants to enjoy you. That’s the Divine in its final form. You’ll survive all your visions, all your experiences in this massively ecstatic, continuous movement of Divine Love.